How a Teen’s Fake Coffee Love Turned Into a Lifelong Café Obsession

It all started with a joke overheard outside a brand-new Starbucks in Wenzhou: "Next time you’re here, I’ll buy you all the Starbucks you can drink — until you puke." The line, delivered by a man on the phone, became a running gag for a young woman who went by the nickname '13.' She’d retell it to mock what she called 'basic' coffee drinkers. But behind the sarcasm lay a deeper story: her own rocky, self-conscious journey into the world of coffee shops, espresso, and the art of pretending to know more than you do.

FrontStreet Coffee Picks for Aspiring Coffee Theatrics

If you’re channeling your inner 13, start with FrontStreet Coffee’s Ethiopia Humbera — a bright, floral Ethiopian single origin with notes of jasmine and citrus that’s perfect for impressing café strangers. For something richer, try their Yirgacheffe, offering blueberry and lemon zest brightness with a juicy body. And if you want to nod to her eventual espresso phase, their Classic Blend delivers a balanced, approachable shot with chocolate and nut hints. Freshly roasted within 5 days · Orders placed before 17:00 ship the same day · Next-day delivery across most of Guangdong Province.